judak

GAY TERM (derived from jp/english/sp or neologies) = MEANING

marhinal - low-class
om - a guy; derived from the Spanish ‘hombre’
bruja-bitch
car-karu
mother-mudra
brother-brudra
father-fudra
sis-sistereka
driver-druva
Jubis - Obese
Kyota - Children
Nyorts - A pair of shorts
Crayola - Cry
Thunder Cats/Chandeliers/Wranglers -old people
scuba diving- cover your nose
flag ceremony-brief
tax free-no payment
anaconda-traitor
eat and ditcher-to eat here
nosebleed-jaw dropping/hard/having difficulty
pocahontas-slut
biogesic-masturbate
Japan/fly- leave
watashi-me, I
otokwa-girl
otokodeshe-boy
backless,badingger Z-a homosexual
years in the making- taking a very long time
chapter.chaka doll -ugly
kyoho-smelly
plastic-untrue
forever-slow
Freestyle -slow in understanding
X-men- formerly a man,now a gay
career-to be seriously involved
Liberty / Statue of Liberty — libre (free)
Carry-alright/okay
Lucky Home Partner — live-in partner
award-reprimanded
Enter the Dragon / Entourage — come in
antibiotic-bitch
kiri - friend
That’s Entertainment-money
Washington / Wishing / Wish — nothing or none
Kape / Capuccino / Coffeemate —be realistic/wake up from reality
ASTRONAUT- means he/she looks like a dog (aso is dog in filipino)
certain- little good looking
carry- a little bit good looking
grot- ugly
lost- uglier
jamaica-small
cornetto - lesbian

GAY TERMS (Derived from Names)- new meaning
Purita Mirasol - poor
Gelli de Belen - Jealous
Carmi Martin - Karma
Tom Jones-hungry
Cynthia Luster-an unknown person
Backstreet Boys — cute boys at the back
Luz Valdez — to lose
Winnie Santos -to win
Cookie Chua / Cookie Monster — to cook
Nina Richie Alagao-Rich
Bitter Ocampo — sad
SARAH JANE PAEZ - social climber

judang

Cairo Egypt -- lets go, tara na

Malaysia India Japan -- malay ko sa yo..

China Cojuangco -- mamahalin ; imported

Cathy Mora / Cathy Dennis -- ma kati;itchy

pyukersya -- slut

ninyonyobe -- sinasabi

Elsa Klensch -- Ma EL-ya

Boyband -- boyfriend na majoba

Strungga -- nenokin;nakawin

Purita Malaviga -- mahirap

*** iba post ko na lang ulet..saka *** use in a sentence baka memyang onti ko ilagay..hehehe

eto pa cont..

Biyondila -- kandila;candle

PaCindy Kurletor -- sindihan ang biyondila

Kumpipi -- confess

Jimba-ers -- Simbahan

Iglesia Iklaters -- Bisita Iglesia

Walkathon Everly -- prusisyon

Gay Langauge

Anik / Anetch — ano (what) / which
Balaj — balahura (shameless)
Bitter Ocampo — malungkot (sad) / nagngingitngit (fuming mad) / bitter
Baklah / Baklush — used instead of one’s name, may refer to any gender
Givency / Janno Gibbs / Debbie Gibson — bigay (to give)
That’s Entertainment / Anda / Andalucia / Anju / Anjo Yllaña — datung (money)
Fatale — sobra (excessive) / to the max
Feel / Fillet o’ Fish — type / gusto / natipuhan (like)
Fly — alis (leave)
Forever — palagi (always) / matagal / mabagal (slow)
Pagoda Cold Wave Lotion — pagod (tired)
Washington / Wishing / Wish — wala (nothing or none)
Chanda Romero — tiyan (tummy)
Mahalia Jackson — mahal (expensive)
Kuya Germs — madumi (dirty) / bearer of germs
Lucresia Kasilag — lukaret / baliw (crazy)
Lucita Soriano — loser na sorry pa
Luz Valdez — matalo (to lose)
Winnie Santos — manalo (to win)
Award — pinagalitan / pinagsabihan (reprimanded)
Freestyle — slow makagets (to understand) / slow
Imbey / Im — imbyerna (irritation)
Jowa / Jowabelles / Jowabella — karelasyon / BF or GF
Kape / Capuccino / Coffeemate — magising ka sa katotohanan (be realistic)
Lupita Kashiwahara — malupit (cruel)
Rita Gomez — nakaka-irita (irritating personality)
Enter the Dragon / Entourage — pasok (to enter) / come in
Julie Andrew / Jolina Magdangal — mahuli (caught in the act)
Antibiotic — antipatika (bitch)
48 Years / 50 Golden Years / 10,000 — matagal (after a long time)
Crayola — iyak (to cry)
Thundercats / Chandeliers / Masyonda — matanda (old people)
Wrangler — gurang (also means old)
Jubis / Juba — taba (fatso)
Jutay / Jutes — maliit (small)
Kangkang — sex
Reyna Elena — ulan (to rain)
X-Men — dating lalaki (formerly a man) now gay
Morayta / Murriah Carrey — mura (cheap)
Pamintang Durog / Pamenthols — closet gays / acting as men
Backstreet Boys — cute boys at the back
Chiminey Cricket — chimay (maid)
Goodbye Suklay — goodbye
Fayatollah Kumenis — payat (skinny)
Anaconda — ahas (a snake) / traitor
Anong petsa na? — asked when someone is taking too long to dress up, etc.
Charing/Tienes — jest / a joke / not serious
Kaplang — mali (error) / mistake
Barbra Streisand / Barbara Perez — bara / binara (bluntly rejected)
Regal Drama Hour / Maalala Mo Kaya — when someone tells a sob story
_______, ikaw ba yan? — when someone acts like another
person, maybe a showbiz personality or not. (example: Vilma Santos, Ikaw Ba yan?)
Purita Kalaw — walang pera (broke) / mahirap (poor)
Rica Peralejo — mayaman (rich, from the Spanish word rica)
Chova / Chovaline Kyle — chika lang (small talk)
Cookie Chua / Cookie Monster — magluto (to cook)
Clasmarurut / Klasmarurut — classmate
Cynthia Luster — hindi kilalang babae o lalake (unknown she or he)
Daot — insulto (insult)
Eksena / Eksenadora — mahilig pumapel / mahilig sumabat (someone who always likes to figure in a scene)
Emote — mag-inarte pa rin (one who is over-acting)
Karir/Career — sineryoso ang isang bagay like BF or work (to be seriously involved)
Lafang — kain (eat)
Lapel — malakas ang boses (someone with a loud voice)
Carry / Keri / Cash & Carry — sige (OK or alright)
Cathy Dennis — “makati” (frisky) or promiscuous
Char / Charot / Charing / Charbroiled — not ok
Liberty / Statue of Liberty — libre (free)
Okray — paninirang puri (criticize)
Lucky Home Partner — live-in partner
In Fairness — pampalubag loob (to console)
Compared to Lugaw — kesa wala (better than nothing)

10 Conyo-mandments, Konyo ka ba?

10 Conyo-mandments

1. Thou shall make gamit "make+pandiwa".
ex. "Let's make pasok na to our class!"
"Wait lang! I'm making kain pa!"
"Come on na, we can't make hintay anymore! It's in Andrew pa, you know?"

2. Thou shall make kalat "noh", "diba" and "eh" in your pangungusap.
ex. "I don't like to make lakad in the baha nga, no? Eh diba it's like, so eew, diba?"
"What ba: stop nga being maarte noh?"
"Eh as if you want naman also, diba?"

3. When making describe a whatever, always say "It's SO pang-uri!"
ex. "It's so malaki, you know, and so mainit!"
"I know right? So sarap nga, eh!"
"You're making me inggit naman.. I'll make bili nga my own burger."

4. When you are lalaki, make parang punctuation "dude", 'tsong" or "pare"
ex. "Dude, ENGANAL is so hirap, pare."
"I know, tsong, I got bagsak nga in quiz one, eh"

5. Thou shall know you know? I know right!
ex. "My bag is so bigat today, you know"
"I know, right! We have to make dala pa kasi the jumbo Physics book eh!"

6. Make gawa the plural of pangngalans like in English or Spanish.
ex. "I have so many tigyawats, oh!"

7. Like, when you can make kaya, always use like. Like, I know right?
ex. "Like, it's so init naman!"
"Yah! The aircon, it's, like sira!"

8. Make yourself feel so galing by translating the last word of your sentence, you know, your pangungusap?
ex. "Kakainis naman in the LRT! How plenty tao, you know, people?"
"It's so tight nga there, eh, you know, masikip?"

9. Make gamit of plenty abbreviations, you know, daglat?"
ex. "Like, OMG! It's like traffic sa LRT"
"I know right? It's so kaka!"
"Kaka?"
"Kakaasar!"

10. Make gamit the pinakamaarte voice and pronunciation you have para full effect!
ex. "I'm, like, making aral at the Arrhneo!"
"Me naman, I'm from Lazzahl!"

I'm 38% Virgin ^_^

Here's the deal... Start with 100% and subtract 1% for everything that you've done. Don't bother typing answers to the question....it makes it more interesting! The lower the score means the nastier you are.
Then repost as _% Virgin

1. Smoked?
2. Drank alcohol?
3. Cried when someone died?
4. Been drunk?
5. Had sex?
6. Been to a concert?
7. Given a handjob/gotten a handjob?
8. Given a blowjob/gotten a blowjob?
9. Been verbally/sexually harassed?
10. Verbally/sexually harassed somebody?

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 90%

11. Felt someone up and/or been felt up?
12. Laughed so hard something came out of your nose?
13. Cheated on a boyfriend/girlfriend before?
14. Been cheated on by a boyfriend/girlfriend?
15. Been to prom?
16. Cried at school?
17. Gotten lost in a WalMart or a department store?
18. Went streaking?
19. Given or received a lap dance?
20. Had someone of the opposite sex in your room?

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 82%

21. Had someone of the opposite sex sleep over?
22. Slept over at someone of the opposite sex's house?
23. Kissed a stranger?
24. Hugged a stranger?
25. Went scuba diving?
26. Driven a car?
27. Gotten an x-ray?
28. Hit by a car?
29. Had a party?
30. Done serious drugs?

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 76%

31. Played strip poker/darts?
32. Got paid to strip for someone?
33. Ran away from home?
34. Broken a bone?
35. Eaten sushi?
36. Bought porn?
37. Watched porn?
38. Made porn?
39. Had a crush on someone of the same sex?
40. Been in love?

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 71%

41. French kissed?
42. Laughed so hard you cried?
43. Cried yourself to sleep?
44. Laughed yourself to sleep?
45. Stabbed yourself?
46. Shot a gun?
47. Trash talked someone and then acted like their best friend the next day?
48. Watched TV for 9 consecutive hours?
49. Been online for 9 consecutive hours?
50. Watched an animal die?

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 64%

51. Watched a person die?
52. Kissed and/or messed around somewhere with at least 1 person present?
53. Pranked somebody?
54. Put somebody in the hospital?
55. Snuck into someone's room and/or your own room after being out?
56. Kissed somebody of the same sex?
57. Dressed punk?
58. Dressed goth?
59. Dressed preppy?
60. Been to a motocross race?

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 61%

61. Avoided somebody?
62. Been stalked?
63. Stalked someone?
64. Met a celebrity?
65. Played an instrument?
66. Ridden a horse?
67. Cut yourself?
68. Bungee jumped?
69. Ding dong ditched somebody?
70. Been to a wild party?

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 55%

71. Got caught stealing something?
72. Kicked a guy in the balls?
73. Stolen a boyfriend/girlfriend from a friend?
74. Went out with your friend's crush?
75. Got arrested?
76. Been pregnant?
77. Babysat?
78. Been to another country?
79. Started your house on fire?
80. Had an encounter with a ghost?

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 51%

81. Donated your hair to cancer patients?
82. Been asked out by someone that you never thought you'd be asked out by?
83. Cried over a member of the opposite sex?
84. Had a boyfriend/girlfriend for over 3 months?
85. Sat on your butt all day?
86. Ate a whole carton of ice cream all by yourself?
87. Had a job?
88. Gotten cut from a sports team?
89. Been called a whore?
90. Danced like a whore?

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 44%

91. Been mistaken for a celebrity?
92. Been in a car accident?
93. Been told you have beautiful eyes?
94. Been told you have beautiful hair?
95. Raped somebody?
96. Danced in the rain?
97. Been rejected?
98. Walked out of a restaurant without paying?
99. Punched someone/slapped someone in the face?
100. Been raped?

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 38%

Cruel Algebra of Love

According to an internet counter on one website dedicated to roughly estimating the population of the Earth at any given moment, the planet is host to 6,509,409,546 people as of 3:30 p.m. eastern time, March 28, 2005. This counter increases by around three units every second, which means by the time you finish this sentence, there will be enough humans born in that miniscule duration to form a basketball team.

This raises some interesting points such as, “how do
they calculate the birth rate as opposed to the death rate arrived at three
people per second?” or “who bothers thinking this crap up?”, and most
significantly, “who will all these new humans vote for American Idol?” Enticing stuff really.

It also calls into question the validity and romance
on the One True Love. Let’s do the math.

There is six and a half billion people currently
converting oxygen. According to further statistics, three-fifths of the world’s
population is female, meaning we're already left with two and a half billion
men, to choose from. Deduct the underage boys and the extremely geriatric,
along with the married, the mentally deranged, the Catholic priests, and the
criminally violent, and you should be left with about (and I’m guessing at this
point) a billion.

As an added modifier, let’s disqualify the huge chunk
of men you will never meet anyway due to geographic, language and time
constraints. . As I find no resources to
estimate this demographic, I’m going to say you’ve still got a fair amount of
nominally sane, sperm producing males left to contemplate, and who
may reciprocally consider you as a perfect match.

So you see, the first
obstacle of serious consideration towards the possibility of the One True Love is that it literally is one-in-a-million-lottery. You have to consider the
immense amount of good fortune or, if you believe in this sort of thing,
destiny involved in finding the perfect match given the sheer magnitude of men out there. Its worst than finding a needle in a sack of needles. We got to
endure a lot of pin heads and pricks.

Now if the romantic supposition of the One True Love
was more than just a notion and was actually a watertight fact of human
existence, if by some fantastic science they are able to demonstrate that two
people are indeed meant for each other in the most biological senses, I believe that the entire human race will come to an abrupt end. On the occasion that CNN or the scientific Americans can excitedly publishes its findings that trough comprehensive DNA testing or through an accidental CAT scan of deliriously happy couple, they have discovered that
there is such a thing a the perfect match. I believe that we will be dead soon
after. Dead. Like the leaders of the Abu Sayyaf.

There are certain things that man is not supposed to
know for certain. Or better yet, there are certain things man is supposed to
earn the right to know for certain. The existence of God, the attainment of
peace, and the One True Love. These are the concepts that should never be
compromised or cheapened by convenient access, because by their very essence, they can only be realized through a process. Like jealous deities, these abstraction demand sacrifice, and diligence, and allegiance, before the miracles and bounty can be witnessed. They are the fuel and the engines of human evolution and it is not the knowledge of them that drives us, but it is
process of searching for them that makes us worthier people. The answer is only satisfying when the right question is asked.

Because it hurts like a serrated knife sawing slowly
through my shinbone when we're apart, it appears obvious, to me, that what I am suffering is a symptom of true love. Because his arms melded seamlessly
into the contour of my body, & our conversations
were almost poetic in cadence and resonance, & he smelled like freshly sharpened Mongol pencils (which happens to drive me insane with lust), I assume it must be true love.. Unfortunately, such symptoms are hardly accurate indicators of a proper diagnosis. I suffer such bouts of polarized emotions all the time; whether it’s on a date (well, kinda something like it) or when I have too much to drink. Heck, I feel I could marry this cup of coffee I’m sipping right now.

This is not to say that I'm wrong about *e%* or
whoever it may be, being the ones amongst the millions out there. It seems
evident that he must be special if "I feel that he is". And perhaps, he could
be the perfect match for me. I’m not saying that he is. Let’s just assume
that. And you know who I’m referring to. Right?

I must divert myself from such a restrictive philosophy. As I stated earlier, True Love is one of those things that has to be earned, not just discovered. We all hear stories of couples that meet in the most unexpected of circumstances, and have stayed together despite the rigors of age and senescence, and who claim to have been fortunate enough to have ended up with their kindred soul. For every wedding speech that created
these mushy anecdotes, I guarantee there are just as much as much separation statements claiming “diametrically opposed differences”. While it is certainly romantic to imagine two wandering souls finding each other amidst the ocean of possible permutations, it is so much more exhilarating to find that they worked it as well.

To return to my hypothesis that we would all drop
dead upon the conclusive discovery that there was but one person for each
person, and that we could actually find out right away, let us embark on a
disturbing fiction. Imagine a machine, like a photo booth, wherein one could
sit inside, pay a couple thousands of pesos, and have the computer within
analyze the participant through x-rays or whatnot, and within five minutes
print out a picture of his One True Love complete with his email address and
the best time to instant message him. Out of nagging curiosity, and against my better judgment, I probably would take the damn test. But a smarter person would refuse.

Because all the poetry and art and communal progress
that we, as a race, have achieve thus far, will unravel when Marc Ace is
supposed to be with %E*#. I knew it. Deep down inside, at
the bosom of our personal hells, we all knew it.

I believe in true love, but not necessarily a One
True Love that exist independently on our influence. That would be an
unbelievably a cruel algebra. I think the mathematics of singularity, while
romantic beyond description and enthusiasm reserved for unique situations. But requisite to that I believe that everybody should be able to love again with the same ardor, even with a different person. Circumstances beyond our control will occasionally determine whether or not we can be with a person, such as my secret love that is not a secret anymore (do you want me to divulge it again? my name is.... R*** ( clear commercial)). If we order ourselves to a force we cannot control, we risk crippling our ability to assimilate and enjoy future experiences, sometimes permanently.

To bring this rambling article to concise summation,
we have to be optimistic about what we are going through, regardless of how
bleak it may seem. Perhaps, there is such a thing as one person per person, but that is a matter of personal philosophy best exercise by loving him the
best as I can, while I can. In the end, having a healthy, fruitful
relationship with another is simply a reflection of how much I'm having a
healthy, fruitful relationship with myself.

One day. Hopefully, even I will settle down and end
up with the person I love, not because was engineered by fate or biology to be my perfect match, but because we both worked at it. Or because of a potent viral epidemic wipes out every other man on the planet, making me the last virile male specimen in an Amazonian island of double X chromosomes. In which case I refuse to be selfish with my love.

What sadness is?

Is it an emotion? Is it a fact? have experienced it at one time or another- in times of illness, loss, fear, stress, disappointment - as an emotional state brought on by circumstances. My life is on a perpetual edge of sadness.

I feel it lurking around every corner, crouching in the shadows. I wear sadness like a second skin, or at times I feel it sweeping over them like a suffocating wave. Even if I appear upbeat and happy, it is ...always present, a vaguely perceived mist in the distance.